Thursday, August 20, 2015

Greatest Day in History

Today is a historic day for me, for, and for our entire nation because today is the day Deez Nuts became a presidential contender.  Thats right, by coming in third place in a poll of North Carolina voters, Deez Nuts burst onto the scene.  ABC 7 reports on this monumental day below:

The explosive popularity of Deez Nuts began when a courageous poll made the wise decision to ask people what they thought of deez nuts.  We have long suspected that people loved deez nuts, but until now, we had no hard evidence.  As a result of this poll, fans of both Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump have to be asking themselves whether Hillary or Donald can beat off Deez Nuts:

While 9% is a good start, we are going to need a grassroots campaign to shoot through to the lead, avoid being swallowed up by Hillary, and get out fromunda Trump:

Thanks to Twitter, Deez Nuts made the Wall Street Journal, which is a slightly more reputable source than  Not only is the Wall Street Journal writing about deez nuts, but take a look at the tags.  The fact that they added a 'DEEZ NUTS' tag means they already know they are going to write more about deez nuts!

Source: Wall Street Journal

Predictably, the 'lame-stream' media has already started the anti-nuts backlash:

I have some breaking news for ABC 11 - This is real, and it's spectacular! But this is just the tip of things to come. Today I am here to tell you, my fellow Americans, that I am Deez Nuts, and I enthusiastically accept your nomination. I call on all deez nuts fans out there to push to get Deez Nuts added to the ballot in every state.  Together, we are starting a journey, the climax of which will be the Presidency! I am deez nuts, and I approve this message: